Thursday, 28 May 2015

quick write photo


                         Quick write photo

                           This picture was taken in Auckland  and won  Auckland photo competition.
                              We used this photo  because it could bring a lot of ideas to our writing.
          We used complex sentence's , opener sentence's , place a comma in the write place and use short             sharp sentences. I made mine a sad story because he brakes two ribs and a dislocates a  shoulder. We          had to feel like  we were the character I brainstormed my feelings , thoughts and monologue .

 The jump

I’m walking across the old rustic wharf with my friends , I feel there eyes burning  on my back
as I climb on  the fence. I take of my shoes and see the bottom of the water .   I had a beautiful city as a backdrop the sky tower nearly reaching the sky and going through the clouds. I realized when I was on that fence that this is  high !!

I hesitate, mumble  then jump up. Go down as fast as a rocket , I get shocked.
That was the moment that I swam  up from the bottom of the water and felt  the coldness. As I put my head up from the water, I saw the dark ,sad sky.

I climb the ladder up to the wharf ,my ribs are hurting real bad. Next thing I know I’m in the car going to the emergency centre. I see people that look a lot worse than myself some with cuts down there legs  and black eyes.
I see my friends talking to the doctor and saying that we  were just playing truth or dare and we dared him to jump of the wharf.
Well whatever you were doing it was going to have consequences to it . Anyway your friend is good to go he’s got two broken ribs and a dislocated shoulder .
A few minutes later.
`Okay let's go  home and get you to rest.


No comments:

Post a Comment